Thursday, March 28, 2013


From the vault! I found this on my phone and realized it never made it up. Between BIG LOVE and basically everything on TLC, polygamy seems to be all the rage. It got me thinking about the topic of Sister Wives...

The mountain of laundry has finally been tamed to an anthill. Partly through my own efforts, but mostly due to a weekend where Jeremy was left home alone. I mean, Hub 'o the Year Award or what? The girls are gone for 3 days and instead of watching reruns of Wipeout and wacking off to Alyssa Milano, a man does laundry. Alyssa Milano? Vanessa Manillo? Whatevs. Point being: my laundry's done.
Several monthsago when the pile seemed literally insurmountable, everyTuesday eveningafter mommy and me ballet my friend Jen would come over and "sit on my stool." She'd help unload and reload my dishwasher while I chisled away at folding and we'd gab while our girls played in a post pizza haze, memorized by a two year old's answer to Justin Beiber: Buzz Lightyear. Getting my daily chores done with 2 under 3 seemed impossible. Well, to me anyway. Everytime I'd leave for a few hours and my mom was there or Jeremy I'd come home to clean dishes and wiped countertops. How was this possible?! When I'm home alone these girls hang on me like monkeys. Literally. Up in my shit and screaming for tit. But somehow, on Tuesdays, I could get it done. Just having Jenn there, even if she never lifted a finger (though she always did) made it all better. I could breathe. I could fold. We started joking how she was my sister wife. Our friend Jess agreed: "sometimes ya just need someone on your stool. " she says. Sippin' tea in your kitchen. Another body to you rinse plates. Or darn socks. Or whatever it is we do. Another woman there who knows what you're going through and offers her warm body as support. Now I sound like I lez out with my friends. Deal with it. Please, at this point, a spotless kitchen feels as satisfying as any sex I could imagine.
I've talked about competitiveness amongst women, specifically moms, in the past. It's just too gross. Mothers have enough problems combatting the onslaught of Disney princesses and celebrity post baby bodies. We don't need to be against each other. And when we ban together. Support one another. Beautiful things begin happening.
If someone offers you help, TAKE IT. A busy mom wouldn't offer if she wasn't sincere. And if she WAS just "being nice"that's her problem. And if you see another mom struggling, HELP HER. It will come back around. It always does. I know I live in NYC and freaks are everywhere, but it always BOGGLES my mind when mothers won't accept help when I offer it. On the subway. On the street. And since when are you not allowed to smile at someone else's kid when you have a kid with you? People are so paranoid and weird. But now I'm rambling. Help. I was talking about help. If you need it and it's offered, TAKE IT. If its not, ASK FOR IT.
The more I think about it, the more an idea of a sister wife makes sense! I feel like i just "do better" with other women around. I'm more productive, more motivated. I don't really know why. Well, let's be honest, besides squeezing my pores and eating chicken wings there is almost nothing that I don't do better in front of an audience. Maybe its the distraction of a friend? The "whistle while you work" theory? Perhaps. Maybe instead of weekly playgroups (or in addition to) we should start a weekly chore group. You grab 3 girlfriends, and each week you get together and fully clean a house. Scrub it. Organize. That way you just have to upkeep with tidying and wiping! I like it! Then afterwards you could celebrate with wine and snacks. Perfection. Now, imagine if those three girlfriends lived with you all the time. Like in a big giant farmhouse?! Amazing! And you wouldn't even have to look super cute all the time. Just throw your hair in some sort of braid, add a turtleneck and a long denim skirt and you're good to go! This idea is starting to sound better and better by the second. (Except we'd be in lululemon or Target lougewear and messy buns.) Once you get past the jealousy issues and the concept of another chick boning your husband, a little help with baths and lunches and laundry while you place yet anotherSoap.comorder sounds like Heaven. I mean, at least someone's always there so you can take a quick shower. Or poop. Or just cry alone in the bathroom for 5 minutes. A capable adult always on call, allowing you to chug a Chardonnay during Fireman Sam without feeling like a complete irresponsible mess. For better or for worse, "I do."

Im not a huge recipe follower. I'm more of the kind of cook that gets inspired and makes stuff up. By, when I saw my friend Kelley post this dish, I had to swipe it. Another potential advantage to having a sister wife. Inspiration! And I never use a slow cooker.
There just so happens to be one here in the house we're renting. So the stars were aligned and i decided to try it! This recipe is so amazing and so easy. You can serve it as an entree over chips, as I did. Or, you can bring it to a party with chips on the side and it's a ridiculously delish, hot and hearty dip. It's basically fool proof and you could add or omit anything you like. Adding frozen spinach would be awesome, or maybe a flavored cream cheese. So good!

I lb chicken breast
1/2 c frozen corn
A handful or so of grape tomatoes
1/2 jar of salads verde (the green stuff, sometimes it'll say tomatillo salsa)
6-8 oz cream cheese (so either a full brick or just shy of one. I used light, use what you want. If you like it extra creamy or bringing it as the dip I'd use the full brick. Otherwise, six oz is fine.)
Cilantro, for garnish. About 1/4-1/2 c chopped
Blue Corn tortilla chips (use what you want. The blue corn just look super pretty)

Season chicken with salt and pepper. Throw in crock pot. Add tomatoes, corn and cream cheese and a little more salt and pepper on top of that. Cover and turn the crock pot in low. Don't touch for 6 hours. Turn it off and stir. The chicken will magically shred itself. Ladle over a plate of blue corn chips and garnish with cilantro. Pair with my Firecracker Margie and you're in business, baby! Perfect girls night with your sister wives. Real or honorary.

PIX: 1) Me & Abby enjoying post playground firecracker margies. Just cause. 2) Me & Jenn at a schmancy Broadway opening. Ignore my boobs if you can. I forgot my pump that night. Mooooooooo! I'd be proud to have either one of these gorgeous gals as a sister wife! The best! 3) Miss Kelley and her gorgeous daughter AJ. If she didn't live all the way in Milwaukee...I'd be all over that sister wife style. 4) Chicken Mc Dreamy! YUM.

1 comment:

  1. Thanks for the recipe! I'm Heather and I just have a quick question about your blog! My email is Lifesabanquet1(at)gmail(dot)com :-)